In my six months of doing pole fitness, I have realized something really unfortunate. While you are building your confidence and seeing the pure capabilities you have, some of the people you know, or you are close to, might not root for you as much as you would wish they would. Personally, I have always valued the opinion of people I know and/ or care for more than strangers. F*ck honestly sometimes, well most of the time, I let people’s opinions dictate my own. With pole I have noticed that it’s the strangers that cheer harder for you than you cheer for yourself some days, most days honestly.
As I’ve been getting better and being more consistent, I have been trying to be my own biggest cheerleader but its hard sometimes if you have always depended on others being good or bad. Although I try and be other people’s biggest cheerleader it’s not so easy when you are looking in that mirror and all you see is yourself. It’s you and your inner dialogue working really hard.
So lately I’ve been trying to forget about outside influence
This is because let’s be honest if you can’t cheer for yourself, it doesn’t really matter how hard someone else is screaming. (It’s like a bunch of ooms watching rugby screaming at the tv. It will honestly not make much of a difference to the game no matter how much passion they put into the cheering because the players can’t hear them.) That’s how it feels when other people are cheering for me but I’m not cheering for myself because what they are saying is just reflecting back because frankly I don’t believe it. But I have been getting better with cheering for myself.
(Note: as much as the negative opinions and the behind your back chatter sucks. I really f*ck with people cheering for me but that’s what makes it so much worse it’s just a temporary believe that I am doing good. Until I’m alone and looking back at my class videos.)
I want to want to my own reason for improvement
I also want to want my confidence growing not the opinions of others so I started by posting my pole photos and content I was so scared to post them initially but I really love my classes and I am proud of what my body is capable of so I wanted to post it so I did no matter what others might think or if they might judge me. And in just one post it made all the difference. Yes, there might be haters but for the first time in my life I did not make myself small because of others. And with the chain reaction just grew.
I’m not comparing myself to others allow I admire and aspire to be at their level I know that they where also beginners once and with patience and consistency I will get there. I decided I want to be a part of the show case even though it freaks me out. I want to be a part of something that brings me amens joy even if it’s the silliest routine ever and I even did my own little practise session which might seem silly but to me it was the cheering for myself actually being happy with what I am building and the excitement of seeing the final product.
In conclusion:
Just do you choose to do what makes you happy ,overwrite the negative thoughts with positive ones and be open to fall, or bend, and to grow. Being your own cheerleader is hard if you are only starting out now but its one of those things that’s rather late than never, the only person’s opinion that should matter regarding you and your capabilities is you.
(And within reason, a health care professional)
